Advertise on DISCO4.COM
Forum · Gallery · Wiki · Shop · Sponsors
DISCO4.COM > Off Topic - Humour, Rants & Pointless Posts

50 Nerds of Grey !
Post Reply  Down to end
Page 1 of 1
NJSS
 


Member Since: 06 May 2009
Location: Catherington, Hampshire.
Posts: 10463

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Landmark LE Auto Waitomo GreyDiscovery 4
50 Nerds of Grey !

'Harder!' she screamed, 'Harder!!'
'All right,' he said. 'What's the square root of nine times twelve divided by six point three recurring?'

They lay there in bed with Daniel Craig bound and gagged in the middle.
There was an unspoken bond between them.

'I've been a very bad girl,' she said, biting her lip. 'I need to be punished.'
'Very well,' he said and installed Windows 10 on her laptop.

'Come on!' she begged, lying naked before him. 'Do something wild!!’
'OK,' he said, and closed his laptop without shutting it down first . .

'How do you feel about chains?' she whispered, stroking his chest.
He gulped. 'I quite like Pizza Hut but I'm not so keen on McDonalds.'

He was very careful during bondage sessions.
He always used a safe word that contained upper and lower case letters and at least one number.

'So,' she said, entering his bedroom, 'This is where the magic happens.'
'Oh yes,' he smiled, putting on his Harry Potter glasses and cloak.

“So why do you call it Thor’s Hammer?” she asked. “Because it’s so potent?”
“No” he replied. “Because I’m the only one who’s ever held it.”

She knew it was wrong.
She knew it was dangerous.
But she took a deep breath, bit her lip and downloaded the new iOS update anyway . . .

“You’re a naughty girl,” he said, “You deserve to be punished!”
“No thanks, Mr Weinstein,” she said, “I don’t want a part in your movie.”

'Sign this contract' she said, 'And your mind, body and soul will be mine forever!'
He gulped. The iPhone X certainly didn't come cheap.

NJSS
 Am I Gammon or Woke ? - I neither know nor care.

2016 Discovery 4 Landmark
2011 Mercedes Benz SL350 (R230)
1973 MG B GT V8 - 3.9L John Eales engine, 5 speed R380 gearbox, since 1975.
1959 MGA roadster - 1.9L Peter Burgess Engine - 5 speed gearbox
Past LRs - Multiple FFRs, Discos & a Series I - some petrol, some diesel,
none Electric or H2 fuel cell - yet.
There are 10 types of people in this world: Those who understand binary, and those who don’t. 
 
Post #18868565th Dec 2017 2:09 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
Ceekay
 


Member Since: 17 May 2009
Location: Bury
Posts: 2057

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 HSE Lux Auto Waitomo GreyDiscovery 4

Rolling with laughter Thumbs Up
 D4 HSE Lux MY16 Club Waitomo
D3 HSE MY06 missing her still… 
 
Post #18868755th Dec 2017 3:18 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Send e-mail Reply with quote
OJ
 


Member Since: 01 Oct 2017
Location: Loch Leven
Posts: 725

Scotland 

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter
  
Post #18868765th Dec 2017 3:20 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
Grianaig
 


Member Since: 08 Jul 2014
Location: Tyne and Wear
Posts: 1286

Scotland 2014 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 XS Auto Indus SilverDiscovery 4

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter

The iOS update really strikes a chord.
 2014 MY Discovery XS Indus Silver. Sadly gone. Second last LR of forty eight years continuous ownership.  
Post #18868835th Dec 2017 3:39 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
NJSS
 


Member Since: 06 May 2009
Location: Catherington, Hampshire.
Posts: 10463

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Landmark LE Auto Waitomo GreyDiscovery 4

Some more:-

They tried it standing up, sitting down and bent over the kitchen table but it was no good - they just couldn't get a decent wi-fi signal anywhere.

'It's so long!' she squealed 'I don't think it'll fit!'
'Sorry' he said 'It isn't easy saying what you want in 140 characters.

She threw him down, tied his hands and feet to the bed and leapt on top of his naked body.
It was then that they were asked to leave IKEA.

He decided to take a chance. He got her out of jail, took her to a cheap hotel and gave her two hundred dollars . .
He loved Monopoly night.

'Mmmm, let's play doctors,' she whispered seductively.
'All right,' he said. 'You be Doctor Who and I'll be Doctor Strange.

NJSS
 Am I Gammon or Woke ? - I neither know nor care.

2016 Discovery 4 Landmark
2011 Mercedes Benz SL350 (R230)
1973 MG B GT V8 - 3.9L John Eales engine, 5 speed R380 gearbox, since 1975.
1959 MGA roadster - 1.9L Peter Burgess Engine - 5 speed gearbox
Past LRs - Multiple FFRs, Discos & a Series I - some petrol, some diesel,
none Electric or H2 fuel cell - yet.
There are 10 types of people in this world: Those who understand binary, and those who don’t. 
 
Post #18868855th Dec 2017 3:56 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
OJ
 


Member Since: 01 Oct 2017
Location: Loch Leven
Posts: 725

Scotland 

Brilliant, keep going, boss lady keeps asking what I’m smiling and laughing at Laughing

Rolling with laughter Bow down Rolling with laughter
  
Post #18869105th Dec 2017 4:53 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
Waylander11
 


Member Since: 21 Apr 2016
Location: Leicestershire
Posts: 519

United Kingdom 2012 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Commercial Auto Ipanema SandDiscovery 4

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter
 D3 in Buckingham blue now SWMBO's Mine D4 commercial
Xenon's fitted Timed climate
EGR Blanked Remapped
Remap Reversing Camera
gear box reset
updated Bluetooth
4x4 info
all done by Bodsy
Fridge fitted
Reversing camera fitted 
 
Post #18869375th Dec 2017 5:27 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
NJSS
 


Member Since: 06 May 2009
Location: Catherington, Hampshire.
Posts: 10463

United Kingdom 2016 Discovery 4 3.0 SDV6 Landmark LE Auto Waitomo GreyDiscovery 4

'I'm all yours tonight!' she cried, 'Do something to me you'd never normally dare do to a woman!'
'All right' he said, and made eye contact.

She said she was turned on by men who took risks . . .
So he took the plastic screen protector off his iPhone.

His steel grey eyes gazed intensely, unwaveringly into hers and she just knew . . . WhatsApp had gone down again.

She said she liked it deep, hard and really, really slow . . . So he took her to see the new Blade Runner movie.

'You're mine!' he cried, staring menacingly, then grinning manically, then frowning angrily . . but his iPhone X still didn't recognise him

Do you prefer going on top or underneath?' he asked, with a glint in his eye. 'It's up to you,' she replied. 'It's your bunk bed.'

His tongue flicked in and out, in and out, faster and faster until she was completely helpless. No woman can resist a good lizard impression

"I have a fetish," she said, coyly. "I like doing it outdoors. Do you have any questions?" "Just one," he said. "What's outdoors?"

'Are you ready for this?’ he asked. ‘When I’m done you won’t be able to sit down for days' She nodded. 'OK' he said and put the sofa on eBay

I can't take any more!' she cried, desperately. 'How much longer will it go on?' 'I'm sorry,' he said. 'These iOS updates take ages.'
 Am I Gammon or Woke ? - I neither know nor care.

2016 Discovery 4 Landmark
2011 Mercedes Benz SL350 (R230)
1973 MG B GT V8 - 3.9L John Eales engine, 5 speed R380 gearbox, since 1975.
1959 MGA roadster - 1.9L Peter Burgess Engine - 5 speed gearbox
Past LRs - Multiple FFRs, Discos & a Series I - some petrol, some diesel,
none Electric or H2 fuel cell - yet.
There are 10 types of people in this world: Those who understand binary, and those who don’t. 
 
Post #18869685th Dec 2017 6:01 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
OJ
 


Member Since: 01 Oct 2017
Location: Loch Leven
Posts: 725

Scotland 

Rolling with laughter stop my sides are sore Rolling with laughter
  
Post #18869825th Dec 2017 6:20 pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Post Reply
Display posts from the last:  
Post Reply Back to top
Page 1 of 1
Jump to:  
Previous Topic | Next Topic >


Posting Rules
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum



DISCO4.COM Copyright © 2004-2024 Futuranet Ltd & Martin Lewis
DISCO3.CO.UK RSS Feed - All Forums

DISCO4.COM is independent and not affiliated to Land Rover.
Switch to Mobile Site