Member Since: 03 Jan 2016
Location: Cambridgeshire
Posts: 1267
Nothing Like Honesty!
Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'
She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'D3 2.7 Zermatt silver (not another one)
D3 4.4 V8 Zambezi silver
D3 4.4 V8 Adriatic Blue
D3 2.7 (gone) Tonga Green
D3 4.4 V8 LHD Tonga Green
FFRR TDV8
Defender 300
2nd Aug 2019 10:01 am
Oswiperus D3 Decade
Member Since: 02 Apr 2010
Location: Chelmsford, Essex
Posts: 1600
Stu
2016 D4 Landmark current
2022 Defender D300 SE Gone
D4 2014 XS Commercial - Gone
D4 2016 hse lux montalcino red - Gone
D3 2005 se java black - current
D3 2005 base manual - gone
D2 1999 TD5 E white - current
2nd Aug 2019 12:38 pm
Moo D3 Decade
Member Since: 13 Aug 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 14429
D4 HSE EU6 (Known as Jeeves)
New Defender L663 110 SE (known as Noddy!) Sold
Sold Volvo XC90 R-Design (known as Basil)
Sold - D4 HSE (Known as Gerty)
No longer the Old Buses original owner
231,000 miles and counting
05 S manual owned from March 2005
D4 Face lifted
Still original injectors and turbo
V8 Front brakes
BAS Remap, Allisport Intercooler and deCat
EGRs blanked
T-Max split charge
Hanibal Expeedition rack
Prospeed ladder
Duratrac tyres
IID BT
BAS FBH control
2nd Aug 2019 12:43 pm
robsmith
Member Since: 02 Sep 2007
Location: Staffordshire
Posts: 2401
You can't beat old age, really you can't
Rob Smith
Silver rools OK
2nd Aug 2019 1:30 pm
ianm27
Member Since: 02 Jun 2016
Location: Hertfordshire
Posts: 2154
Uncle Ray's spare wheel protector
Limo Tint
Blackvue front & rear dashcam
Cruise control switch pack
Bodsy's remote for FBH
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
